SoManyEmotionalDays

:’)

A week of emotions. Sorry guys. This will be quite a mellow entry.

Awin tanye: “Ko tgh hepi ke skang edi?”
Cemane nak jawab? Wrong question at a so very right time. Within this week saje I’ve made lots of mistakes and decisions I shouldn’t have done. I’ve made confessions that I shouldn’t have make. Tak sedar diri. Btol lah org kate.. “cermin muke tu dlu sebelom buat ape2..”. Well, I’ve missed that part. People say when you have something to say to someone, just say it cos you won’t know when you’ll die, to let the things you want to say be left unsaid. Well, I’ve learned that it doesn’t always have to be that way. I’ve jeopardized a supposed-to-be simple friendship to an emotional level. Due to my selfishness of catering into my own personal feelings, I’ve risked this friendship and taken from this friend of mine, a friend he once knew as a fun gal, a place he once leaned on for bedtime stories , a hangout friend to all sorts of places especially his favourite, mamak. I shouldn’t have told whatever I’ve told him. I should’ve just keep my mouth shut and be happy for him even when his happiness means undying heartbreak to me. But, the most important thing.. I should’ve cermin myself.
But it’s over and done. I started this friendship, and at least I need to do something about it. There’s no point of not being friends anymore, or not seeing him anymore; but the sacrifices I will make in the nearest future, I hope he understands. I’ll try and fake every laugh and smile. I won’t cry at his presence for I know it’ll disgust him. I’ve learned the hard way to never let it get that far. For all these things I’ve said and done, I’m sorry. But I’m happy though that he has found someone much much more fun than me, with an additional bonus – he loves her . There won’t be that much problem to leave; at least I know that he’s in good hands, better . But, I’ll try and be the friend he used to have again. A simple kind of friendship .