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Monthly Archives: September 2007

I’mSorryFriends

to all my frens of XYBASE. i’m so sorry sebab tidak berjumpe ngan korg mase wedding jerry. me and shaz got lots of stuff going in our mind, so the rest just ikot je. aku dah rabun, so mase dtg pon x nampak mane kengkawan, so aku mingle only with those yg aku nampak je. not my intention to be rude or anything, tp aku and shaz malas nak jumpe ex-boss yg tgh tgk kitorg mcm singa, n the rest is history. mende ni xde kaitan dgn samada aku penah tengking ko n malas jumpe ko, or aku penah buat salah kat ko n malas nk tgk muke ko, or ko penah buat taik kat aku n aku malas jumpe ko. so… whatever it is, bear in ur minds yg aku x pernah, in my sanity, tried to forget korg. just not my sane days. tp deep inside agak rase kecik ati sbb xde sape invite me to go together or etc. xde sape even bothered except shaz. aku pegi jugak bcos of jerry. and to jet, aku mintak maaf for the statement “sape nak jumpe korg?” and all stuff yg mane ko saket ati sampai x balas my sms semlm. u know me better. just put the blame on me.

 
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Posted by on September 30, 2007 in Life

 

MaafkanAkuYgTakSempurnaUntukDirimu

oho people…

esok hari yg ke-9 kan org puase? tp aku baru 1st day. heheh. sure mati pensan punye. org lain sume dah get used to lepak2, tp aku mesti layu je nih. haih. arini sepatotnye puase, tp malangnye x dapek lg. semlm aku kuar sahur, balek around 2 pagi lebeh cemtu. bile bangon pagi, sah2 la liat, sbb aku sambung keje sampai 3 pagi semlm. 1 thing i noticed, bile aku sahur sebelom tidor, lagi terok aku lapar the next day nye. sbb tu dlu2 aku x sahur. nak prektis balek lah. tp x dapek pahala la pulouk. haih.

things between me and him – we’re starting off the frenship again. i’ll leave him when i found somebody else – di mane aku telah bgtau all my frens and all my relatives that i don’t think i care anymore, but get me someone that wants me. and.. i’ll leave him when he exposed his girlfren. i’m not quite a believer of platonic relationship, and so, i believe i won’t handle it well haha. last nite i dreamt he was SMSing his gf – if i’m not mistaken, the name there is “aaa ain”. kalo x salah la. can u imagine how devastated i was at that time. but i’m learning to let go. he himself said good luck in letting him go. hah. great.

i want to share this one article on dealing with anger – God, i’m bad at this. but one statement that is very true, and reflects what actually happens between me and him –> Anger and intense emotion are normal when you truly love and care. but i guess it doesn’t mean anything to him haha. oh well.. here’s the article:

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3 Ways to Handle Anger Before Anger Handles You

Feelings are much like waves. We can’t stop them from coming, but we can choose which one to surf.” -Jonatan  Mårtensson

In the Western world, we think of strength as big muscles, heavy weights, physical power. But in the ancient Eastern cultures, strength means something entirely different. The yogis think of strength more as an ability to overcome powerful emotions such as anger and jealousy.

In the heat of the moment, a normal person (myself included) will want to lash out. In her song “White Trash Deco,” country singer Cynthia Ford catches her husband cheating and responds with anger and jealousy by maxing out his credit cards to misdecorate his house. The words go like this:

So don’t write any checks cuz they’ll just bounce back
Don’t use the credit cards cuz they’re all at the max
But don’t worry, babe, I spent it all on you
To go along with all the cute little things you do
Oh, I’ve wanted so long just to wring your neck, oh
Instead I redid your house in White Trash Deco

Is this the best way to respond to anger? Probably not. Can most of us relate to it? Hell, yeah! But if we cultivate the rare ability to overcome powerful emotions, we make better decisions. So much of life comes down to the decisions we make in intense, pivotal moments.

Here are some tips on dealing with anger so you can walk proud on your finest path through life:

1. Remember that anger and love are two sides of the same coin

If you really want love in your life, you must be willing to spend a little time with love’s less comfortable relatives, anger and pain. It’s common to think that with anger and pain come breakup and divorce. But the bottom line is the more you love someone, the more able they are to piss you off. So be aware: Anger and intense emotion are normal when you truly love and care. Mel McDaniel sings about this two-sided coin in “Anger and Tears”:

Anger and tears, anger and tears
Is that all that’s left of us after loving all these years
As slowly as love grows how soon it disappears
In a house full of anger and a heart full of tears

Remember, true strength is being able to work through the anger rather than letting the anger work through you.

2. Before you lash out, look within

When you’re struggling with anger, it’s common to blame others for every little thing. A true sign of strength is taking responsibility for yourself. In “Startin’ with Me,” Jake Owen comes to a very yogic resolution to dealing with anger:

If I had a dime for half the things I did that didn’t make no sense at all
I’d be living a little higher on the hog
If only I’d have known
That later on down the road
I’d look back and not like what I see
I’d have changed a lot of things
Startin’ with me

3. Practice feeling without reacting

The 6,000-year old practice of yoga teaches that when you are in challenging situations, you make the best decisions in even the worst of situations if you just breathe and relax. Try it: Lift your arms to the sides of your body and hold them so you form a letter “T.” Allow your arms to stay parallel to the ground for 2, 3, even 4 minutes. When your shoulders start to burn, notice that by breathing and relaxing, you gain more endurance. There’s very little that physical strength, hustle, and effort can do you for you in this situation. As a famous Zen proverb reads: “Nothing on earth can overcome an absolutely nonresistant person.”

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gotta go do some werk. hugs and kisses – xoxo –

 
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Posted by on September 19, 2007 in Life

 

KissingAFool

hola…. 😀

told u guys nak sambung the next day, tp x sempat sbb mcm2 hal lah kekeke.

hari ni aku adelah di rumah. for the first half of the day la. terbgn lambat. pkl 8. so kasitau boss aku werk from home, and dtg belah petang. i wont elaborate more haha.

currently, i’m feeling very disappointed with myself. skarang ni aku tgh terketar2, sejuk sbb opis ni mmg sejuk, champor perasaan penat x berape boleh tdo sbb asek pk psl die. worst still skang ni, stengah jam skali aku terjage, dan tgk tepon, dan pk psl die. tolonglah kalo sesape kenal ustaz memane, bgtau la aku, sbb aku x rase aku tahan lg hidop mcm nih. tlglah kuarkan die dr hidop aku. kuarkan die dr pikiran aku. kan sronok kalo jdk org kaye. aku gerenti dah pegi obersee ddk sane dan take a very long vacation. i need to go meet people. tolonglah aku……..

i’ve picked up my bad habit again. and it’s killing me. masok hari ni dah 2 kali aku kene asthma attack dlm seminggu. aku xleh nak buat ape dah. aku dh try beli buku yg aku suke, tried to read, tp x jln gak. aku beli reader’s digest belambak2, x jalan. aku x berani pegi jalan2 round2 sorg2 sbb nnt aku lg pk psl die, bcos kitorg suke outing jalan2 xde arah. it was a bliss back then. but not now. how wud u feel, bile kite nak spend time ngan org tu, tp tetibe kejap2 ade member sms lah, sape sms lah; padehal kalo time die kuar ngan org lain/member2 die, kalo aku sms, mesti dibalas lmbt. x terase mcm kecewe x?

haih… xpelah. just not my luck.

i’m selling off my car. so kalo sesape nak, email la aku eh. need to do some readjustment in my life.

 
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Posted by on September 14, 2007 in Life