apparently i’ve made a bad initial decision. although i have a hunch that the decision is wise, but somehow i’m suffering a mental disorder only coming back to my old werkplace can cure me. i’ll be moving to kedah in january, and i wish they wud ship me there earlier. i know i wud suffer from the same uneasiness as here, but at least i have a family there. maybe it wud turn out even worst than here, but i’ll let time take its course.
oh. before that, happy hari raya to you! hope it has been a blessed one. someone told me no point of asking for forgiveness from people since my life is already doomed. well darling, are you God to tell me i’m doomed…? you’ve just wasted your faith. maaf zahir batin to all :).
why i resigned is no mystery. to be home with the family. the transition in the previous company went great, but adapting to new life is definitely not how i expected it to be.
previously: first day – i was taken for a tour of the office by the HR. i was introduced to the row of managers, to the teams i’ll be werking with. i was immediately taken into several series of meetings with my manager where he explained to me how things are done here. i was given a buddy to help me in case i need any assistance around the company. i was taken out by my manager for lunch, where i get to mingle more. on the whole, i feel valuable there.
now: first day – i was taken to HR to fill in some papers. i was briefly told of how to submit claims etc, and was brought to the office administrator where she brought me to claim my notebook and tag. for all, i’m the one who need to extend my hand to greet people when i was introduced. were they expecting to only look at me while being introduced? after unplanned decision, i was brought by manager towards the first island we’re in, to introduce the team members. then he had to do some stuff. but before that, i asked him on the plan on training me. he said he didnt have anything in mind, yet. can you imagine that? and he’s from Motorola for God’s sake. isn’t that a well-reputable company as well? what shame has their management taught these ex-employees. then only he said i will need to join in meetings that this malay lady in the team involves in. i have no problem with that, except, that lady seems busy to even look at me. how in the fucking werld will she be able to teach me? am i supposed to ask her each time she’s going to meetings and tag along?? tak ke penyebok namanye tu? if they say, to learn, you need to ask questions. how the hell am i supposed to learn if i dont know WHAT to ask?? i regretted the day i picked up the call from the damn head hunter!
i gotta go and cool down. nak mandilah. tata.